Plenty to hide...

A few days ago there was a story in the Mail about a Liverpool school banning footballs from its playground. As this is just the sort of story the paper likes to drama-queen up from absolutely nothing I decided to look a little more into it and undertook my in depth investigative approach of copy / paste into Google.

Unfortunately it appeared to be an almost true account of what happened (The main difference being it wasn't 'elf 'n' safety dictators making this happen it was a Headmaster scared of being prosecuted by the parents of the precious little children and their knowledge that where there's blame there's a claim).

However during my intensive sniffing around on the subject I came across this story in the Liverpool Echo.

Really that's exactly what the story is about. A 42 year old gran caught getting frisky with the family pet - who I don't imagine is quite as erudite as Brian Griffin.

Brian Makes his move

This made me think of the Daily Mail's apparent indignity at the upcoming 2011 census. I had assumed they were firmly against it because they just can't bare being told they had to do something.

 "You're telling me I have to complete the form? I shan't, I won't and I shan't. It's probably costing me a king's ransom in taxes and is only done to please the Muslims / Gays / Public sector workers / Benefit scroungers (Circle the scape goat you're particularly angry about today.)"

Maybe there's more to it though? Maybe they don't want to complete the form because they've something a lot more sinister to hide, A.N. Wilson is dead set against it.

Now there's absolutely no evidence that A.N. Wilson will have to admit his Basset hound is his nearest and dearest - he seems more distressed at the cost, at a time it appears he's having to take a pay cut - but it does make me smile to think of all the real dog 'lovers' out there worrying about how to fill in their forms.

"No Sheba I'm not ashamed of us, but you must understand ours is a love that cannot be spoken. Now pull yourself together. Walkies!" Tweet