Dangerous hindquarters

This made me smile from the front page of express.co.uk today:

The van is quite important I imagine

Not the story itself, a sad tale of someone who died for the pipe-dream of a bigger arse (I wonder why they didn't try Greggs bakery. The sausage rolls certainly have helped with my posterior enlargement programme), it's the thought of an illegal buttock and what it might do to kill someone???

I feel certain the EU are behind this travesty somehow. Back in the good old days the British kitemark stamped on the backside of a grubby student guaranteed safety for all using it. Since our Euromasters have taken charge of rump safety, and it's all in metric or something, the dangers posed have quadrupled. More so for the squeezed middle.

It's time the Express took on this important issue and kicked of the

It's an arse not a derriere!

The

campaign for British bums.

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