Sunday 30 January 2011

To me, to you...

Coalition government's education policy laid out in all its glory


Other Whitehall departments are said to be following suit an senior source today revealed.

"Poor quality comedians are the future of this country. Their steadfastness in the face of adversity are what this nation needs to restore its place in the world. Any man who can stand and intentionally attempt to make a room full of people laugh - despite being as funny as a winter gas bill - deserves the opportunity to show us how our public services should be run.

To this end Eddie Large will be managing a busy A&E department in Oldham, Des O'Connor will be asked to take a lead on hunting down benefit scroungers and Paul McShane - of Hi-de-hi fame - will take over from Sir John Chilcot to head the inquiry into the Iraq war."

No official comment was made by number ten who are understood to be struggling to choose between Ant and Dec as the new communications chief.
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